This week’s parsha (Torah portion) is called Vayishlach, which means, “And he sent.”

The parsha begins with Yaakov (Jacob) sending messengers/angels (the same word in Hebrew means both angels and messengers) to his brother telling him he was returning home and asking for favor in Asov’s (Esau) eyes.  When he hears that Asov is coming with 400 men, he gets scared and divides his camp into two, talks with god, and sends lots of gifts to Asov.  The same night he sends the gifts, he then wrestles with a man who blesses him and gives him the name Yisrael, because he has wrestled with god.

The next day is the great meeting between the two brothers where they both cry.  Asov offers to go with Yaakov, but Yaakov says he will be too slow because of the livestock and that he will catch up with Asov later.

After parting from Asov, Yaakov journeys to the town of Schem where the prince of the town sleeps with Yaakov’s daughter Dina.  He is in love with her, and agrees to having all the men in the city circumcised in order to marry Dina.  On the third day after the circumcisions, Shimon and Levi (2 brothers of Dina) come and slaughter all the men of the town, and the rest of the sons of Yaakov pillage the town and take the women and children.

When Yaakov finds out, he is not happy with Shimon and Levi, fearing that the inhabitants of the land will now attack him.  God tells Yaakov to go to Bet-El, where he had a dream/vision all those years ago.  Before Yaakov goes, he collects all the idols the people had with them, and along with their earrings, hides them beneath an oak tree near Schem.

They safely arrive in Bet-El, and then we read that Devorah, Rivka’s (Rebecca, the mother of Yaakov) nurse died and was buried there.

After that interlude, god appears to Yaakov and blesses him and tells him that his name is Yisrael.  They leave Bet-El and go towards Efrat.  On the way, Rachel dies giving birth to Benyamin.  Then we read that while Yaakov was traveling, Reuvan slept with Bilhah, his father’s half-wife and Yaakov hears about it.

Right on the heels of this, we get a listing of the children of Yaakov, and then, that Yaakov comes to his father Yitzhak (Isaac) who dies and is buried by both Asov and Yaakov.

The parsha ends with a lengthy description of the descendants of Asov.

What follows, I originally wrote in 2005, while I was living in Israel.

I am not quite sure how to start this.  I have spent the last several weeks visiting family and friends in the United States, and last week was my trip home.  The reason I say week is that I flew out of Portland, Oregon, to Chicago, where I stayed for a few days before I could get a flight back to Israel.

In one way I felt like I was sent on this path because I showed up at a friend’s house on Friday just after they learned his wife was pregnant.  Needless to say, it made for a very joyous shabbat.  I wish them both a happy, healthy child that can thrive in the warm, welcoming home they provided for me.

Now, I have a very close friend in Portland whom I really got to know about five years ago, during the year before I came to live in Israel.  The only time we had to meet on this trip was on the morning before I flew to Chicago.  She had to be sent because this was the perfect moment to meet.

While we were having brunch, she asked me a great and wonderful question:  “Are you living the life you imagined for yourself when you went to Israel 5 years ago?”

I must admit I was taken aback by the question.  It is a wonderful question, and one I had to think about before I answered.  And wouldn’t you know it, I had a long plane ride in front of me, to contemplate the question.  🙂

This leads into one of the things that struck me about the parsha.  Yaakov just discovers that two of his children have destroyed a whole town, and now he is scared of the repercussions:  that the other nations in the region will join together and attack him.

At this point, he suddenly hears a voice telling him to go back to Bet-El, house of power (Bet-El translated).

Why is he being told to go back to there?

Because this is the place he was at 20 years ago when he had a dream.  He dreamed of a ladder that went between heaven and earth and angels were going up and down it, and god was there over him.

Why did god ask him to go there?

I think it is to remind Yaakov of his original dream.

I interpret his dream to mean that he is a servant of god, and that means his life will have ups and downs, but he needs to always remember that god is with him and guiding him, just as god does with the angels.

Is Yaakov living the life he envisioned 20 years earlier?  I don’t know.  I just know that he is in the middle of a real deep low that has to shake his faith in god.  And this was not the first one he has in the parsha.  He also had the worry of meeting his brother, Asov.

Just like at that time when he is given the new name Yisrael, god tells him this time that his name is Yisrael.  What is the meaning of the name?

It means a wrestler of god.

God is telling him that challenging god is ok, and to remember the vow he made 20 years earlier:  to follow god wholeheartedly if god brings him back to the land safely.

The people you wrestle with most, are the one’s who mean the most to you.  God is reminding Yaakov that he matters to god as much as god matters to him.  And that god will look after him, even when times look really bleak.

God is reminding Yaakov of all he has done in order to deserve this name that was given to him before meeting Asov:  “Yaakov, did you forget?  You have grown.  You are no longer Yaakov.  You are now Yisrael.”

For those who saw or read, “Lord of the Rings,” it is like reminding Gandolf that he is no longer a grey wizard; he is now a white wizard.

I offer to you-all the following question:  what was your dream of five years ago?  Or of 20 years ago?  Are you living it?

This is a good question, not just for today, and not just for anytime you are in a down, or difficult moment in your life, but also every 5 years or so, just to check in with your life’s journey.

I hope all of you can look back and either say, “Yes, this is where I wanted to be,” or say, “No, this is better than where I wanted to be.”  I also invite all of you to think about and write down where you would like to be in another 5 years, and share it below in the blog comments.  It will make for an interesting answer in five years time. 🙂

If you want to read what I wrote about this parsha last year, click here.

About the Author

Shmuel Shalom Cohen spent 10 years studying Torah in Jerusalem. Six years ago, he started Conscious Torah to help Jews connect to their tradition in ways they didn’t think possible. Shmuel also started, and is the executive directory of Jewish Events Willamette-valley, a non-profit whose mission is to build Jewish community, pride, and learning. In his free time, Shmuel likes walks in nature, playing music, writing poetry, and time with good friends.