Last Thursday was Purim, and I was very busy preparing a Purim Seuda (meal) for adults, and then enjoying the party.  So, I didn’t get a chance to write anything for the Thursday Shmooze.  It is now Thursday again, and I am wondering what to write about.  I keep going around with the same thoughts, over and over again in my head, desperately hoping a new thought will take hold.  And finally a new thought flickers to life.

The thought is actually an old one.  It comes out of the preparation workshop for Passover (which I like to call the Exodus Workshop).  And it is something a teacher of mine, Francesca De Grandis, used to say:  if you want to make a change in your life, you first need to remove the old thing.  And you also have to have something new to replace it with.   This is the hard part.  I have an idea for change.  I want a cleaner house.  So, I need to sweep my kitchen floor.  Or I want to lose weight.  I need to eat less and exercise more.  Great ideas.  But in the course of my day, even when I have a few minutes, I don’t do these things because I forget to do them.  I have the best of intentions, but I am so busy, I don’t remember.  And when I have a moment, I think to myself, “What should I do?”  and these ideas, just don’t pop into my head.

So, the question for me is:  how do I remember to add some new change into my life?  The Torah gives one answer.  We leave slavery and what should we do?  We don’t know anything else.  So, haShem gives us the task of building the mishcan (tabernacle) and everyday that is what we work on.  Eventually it gets done, but by then we no longer think of being slaves, we think of volunteering to do good in the world.  Great!  How do I take that and apply it into my life today?

A couple of thoughts I have is to write a list of the things I want to do every day, including the new items.  I write the list at night as I review what I did during the day.  Then in the morning, I review the list so I know what to aim for.  Then, on top of that, I set the alarm on my cell phone (with a note telling me about this new item), so that I remember and think about this new change I want to make, and also do it.  Another thing Francesca said was to keep the changes small and manageable.  It is easier to do and my resistance to doing it goes down.  The other thing is that I don’t beat myself up if I don’t do it.  I just add it to the list and try again the next day.  The more I see it, the more I keep it in my mind, the more likely I will do it.  And the more my life will change for the better.  Oh, and don’t tell anyone, but this a principle of the Jewish practice of Mussar or self improvement.

And for those wondering what this has to do with the Exodus Workshop, the workshop is about changing your life and getting you to move forward towards your hopes and dreams, towards the promised land.  To get to your promised land, you need to start acting like you are already there, which is hard because you are not even used to thinking about the details of that life.  And with Purim keeping me so busy, I forgot to do one of these acts.  Then this week, I had a few minutes and wondered what to do with them, and felt uncomfortable because I knew there was something I wanted to do, but could not remember.  I finally did remember, and did the small act and felt better.  And then I remembered the ideas mentioned above to keep this new act in my mind more, so I would do it more.

What methods work for you?  Please share your methods, or tell try these ideas out and tell us what you think.  And have a great shabbat.

About the Author

Shmuel Shalom Cohen spent 10 years studying Torah in Jerusalem. Six years ago, he started Conscious Torah to help Jews connect to their tradition in ways they didn’t think possible. Shmuel also started, and is the executive directory of Jewish Events Willamette-valley, a non-profit whose mission is to build Jewish community, pride, and learning. In his free time, Shmuel likes walks in nature, playing music, writing poetry, and time with good friends.